Fortune Favors the Bold

Fortune favors the bold.

It’s what I say to myself whenever I need a kick in the pants, when I'm hesitating on something, or when I'm about to plunge into water, be it dark, deep, mysterious, or most often, just really really freakin' cold. And I said it to myself two years ago today, when I pulled the trigger and bought my very own underwater photography gear.

I had dabbled with the underwater photography thing before this, but I had always rented the gear and had never gathered the nerve to take the plunge (ha ha, water joke) and make the substantially expensive investment of buying the equipment for myself. It wasn't a small amount of money and it's kind of a niche type of photography, so while I've always been really at home in the water, and while I'd long admired underwater photography, I hadn't seriously thought of pursuing it. Cut to January of 2016; my friend Jessica Dunbar, an amazing artist who I admire, asked me if I would help her with a series of paintings she had in mind by shooting reference photos of models underwater for her. That lit a fire under me, because I wanted to do a good job for her, even though I said to her very plainly at the meeting where we first talked about it, "I've done some underwater, but not very much. I might suck at this." (She laughed and told me she had faith in me.) We planned dates and locations and worked together to find our first set of models, and the Mermaid Project was born. Two years ago today, after our first couple of mermaid/underwater modeling days and after renting the equipment multiple times, I finally decided that I wanted to buy the housing and own it for myself, which would open up a whole new world for me and a new focus for my business.

So I sat down in my office, fired up my computer, and I priced it all out.

Eep.

I hemmed and hawed. A lot. Then I hemmed and hawed some more. Finally, I went down the hall to Brendan’s office, totally freaked out, and told him what I had planned and illuminated for him the decently large amount of dollars it was going to take. I finished talking and waited, thinking he would laugh at me or tell me that it wasn't a good idea. But, in keeping with his title as Best Husband Ever, and true to his constant unblinking support of everything I do, and in line with his calm and steadfast encouragement when it comes to my various wacky schemes and cockamamie business ventures, he grinned and said, “Do it. I know you and you can get really good at this, and if you own the equipment, you'll have the freedom to really go for it and not be stuck having to rent it whenever you want to shoot underwater stuff. Just go order the equipment before you talk yourself out of it.”

So I cried a little, and then I ordered it. And right as I went to the final order review screen, I whispered to myself,

"Fortune favors the bold"

and I hit "complete order". Boom. Done.

I haven’t regretted it. Not for a second.

I get that two years might not seem like much, but I feel like the pressure I have put on myself to make this whole thing worth it has been...well, worth it, I guess? I feel like I’ve grown pretty darn fast in this realm. Am I the best? Heavens, no. I have tons of room to grow in this and it has been the most challenging thing I've attempted in my career thus far. I am really really hard on myself, but it feels like this is paying off, and I think (I hope?) that I'm continuing to make my clients feel gorgeous and that I'm keeping them happy. As much as I have my own nagging self doubt and for as many times during learning and experimenting with shooting underwater that I've said to myself, "man, this is harder than I thought it would be", I have a lot that makes me want to keep going. I have a growing influx of lovely folks who want to book me for their own aquatic adventures. I have constant inspiration from Jessica and her art, and whenever she gets started on a painting based on a photo I've given her, I sit here thinking, "Hey! I helped!". Moreover, I am beyond lucky to have the fervent, funny, and unwavering support from my own little Mermafia; they lend me their faces, tails, pools, and participation when I need to test new equipment or add to my portfolio, they're always down for an adventure out into the wilds of Florida, and maybe best of all, they never complain or hesitate when it comes to diving right into the water with me, even when it's so cold that it makes all of us go, "Whyyyyyy are we doing this? We could have stayed up on the deck where it's warm!!!" And of course, I have Brendan, who never questions me or lets me question myself. He's always there to remind me that things will be okay when I’m doubting myself and that I need to quit fretting and just let things flow.

TL: DR; underwater photography is sometimes scary, always challenging, and super rewarding, and I’m addicted now. Because, damn, y'all, more than anything? It's just ever so much fun.

Life is the bubbles and I'm a lucky lucky girl.